My contemplation today has been, what is resurrection, and how have I been impacted by it?
Resurrection occurs when a thing once thought dead returns to life. A thing left in the past reemerges in the present. Perhaps even when an aspect of my being is forgotten, long ago sealed away, reappears in an alive way. For example, the characteristics of my child-self- playful, innocent, open-hearted- return again to show that they are still alive in me. In this way, resurrection is a blessing. But too, shadows of the past, the things I'd like to leave dead sometimes come back again. An old hurt I caused someone else, a time when I behaved recklessly and put others at risk, I might try to seal them away out of my memory, but they visit again even without invitation. In this way, resurrection can also be a blessing.
When past mistakes come back around, when old ghosts come visiting, it's an opportunity to find resolution. If I can summon the courage to look directly at them, and forgive, we might both be released, the ghost and me. This is a return to life- my integrated self emerging out of the darkness of aversion.
There have been times too when I felt near death. When I felt so unseen by the world that I might as well be dead. That people didn't get me, that there was no place for me. In my experience that kind of despair is akin to death. Like being permeated by a lifelessness, a lack of color and texture, like life is 2-dimensional and black & white. Only to be resurrected through miracles of love and forgiveness. And support from family and cherished friends.
Perhaps this is the prized gem inside of the concept of resurrection: a hint that life always returns to itself.
This day, Easter, is a Christian holiday to celebrate the resurrection of Christ. Thought to be dead, he returns on this day to demonstrate the deathlessness of being. That life created in the image of a timeless source, God, can find no ending. Even as we cycle through various stages, we find ourselves reborn each time, resurrected from despair into demonstrable power. Resurrected from blindness into seeing. Resurrected from numbness into feeling. Have you noticed these cycles within yourself?
Resurrection is a return to life. From where do I return? It's like a cosmic game of hide and seek. Life hides itself in a belief in death, only to return to itself full of life.